Seth-n-Jode's Adventures

Derby Dilemma

We don’t dress up often, but we do try to shine up for notable events.  Such an occasion emerged when Mr. Cooper invited us to the Dallas racetrack to watch horse races including the 2022 Kentucky Derby live on jumbo screen.  Sporting a bow tie and high heels, we hobnobbed with other attendees until the stadium quieted for the Kentucky Derby and we witnessed the unbelievable sprint of “Rich Strike” to win the race 

Jody watched the video of that race at least 80 times (matching the odds against Rich Strike).  Test your own interest in Jody’s obsession at https://youtu.be/o_8ZgLZSWMk.  Be careful however, since Jody’s enthusiasm for this race resulted in her subsequent trip to the ER. (If you’ve received this letter before, you knew that one of would end up in the hospital. Sigh.)

The sequence unfolded in this manner.  The week after the Derby, Jody hosted her first in-person meeting with the team. She was fired up and the meeting was progressing great! After a few hours, she called for a quick break to make a dash to the restroom…imagining herself to be like Rich Strike.  She started at the back but running fast and smooth secured a clean line through her coworkers.  She leaned around the second turn when her high heels (which she hadn’t worn in three years) conspired against her.  The carpet caught a heel and she cartwheeled to land against the wall.  Her coworkers described it looking like Wile-E-Coyote testing an Acme rocket.  Her foot was quite broken.  Unlike Rick Strike, my girl wouldn’t be lauded with a rose blanket.

Swimming Boldly

Jody was desperate to regain her fitness after being sidelined for two months after breaking her foot.  Promptly after her cast was removed, she hobbled over to the local rec center swimming pool. Jody stands, wobbling on crutches, wearing pink inflatable arm floaties, patiently waiting for an open lane for the “Masters Swimming” class to begin. The swim team captain’s jaw drops.  Even Jody’s mom concedes that Jody doesn’t swim “like a dolphin” rather her style is more akin to “cannon ball…y”.  A famous poet once wrote, “Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it.” but one needs to have enough self-awareness to realize that boldness won’t prevent you from drowning. The lifeguards become more agitated as class continues and Jody progressively resembles a “cannon ball.”  

Eventually, the lead lifeguard rushes over to throw a buoy and shouts “Are you OK?”  The team captain leans over to delicately suggest that Jody consider a different class like “Learn to Swim.”  Jody flashes back to her memory of the only class she ever failed.  Swimming.  Back in kindergarten!   She fumes… but faces a dilemma.  She needs help getting out of the pool!     

River Dance

There are good trips, not-so-good trips, and great trips.  Our summer trip, boating the Gates of Ladore section of the Green River, was magical.  Everyone in the boating party was well prepared. The beaches were sandy. The sun was warm.  The river passes through an extraordinary landscape of sculpted metamorphic stone in the Uinta Mountains.  Deep swimming holes invite splendid “Cannonball” runs from the adjoining beach.  Paradise! 

There was however one little hiccup.  Our final night on the river, we celebrated successfully navigating the many challenging rapids we’d overcome.  The music was awesome and we seemed to dance on that beach forever.  We danced late into the night and drank far too much.  The next morning everyone hobbled around like a crash victim.  We each nursed our pains over fresh coffee and shared stories about everyone’s replacement body parts.  We agreed that these new parts just don’t perform as well as OEM (Original Equipment from Mom).       

Digital Breadcrumbs

This fall, we arranged a weeklong hike with Mike, Betty, and Rhonda following the Salt Creek Trail in the badlands of Utah. We have travelled here to tour the ancient Puebloan dwellings scattered throughout this valley and pore over messages contained in the many primeval pictographs.  Despite this being some of the more remote country we’ve been to, I have confidence that we won’t get lost because we have excellent maps.  I carefully monitored Jody as she downloaded gigabytes of satellite imagery so that we could follow our ‘dot’ along our digital trail. Jody academically informs my luddite sensibility that it’s like 21^st century breadcrumbs. 

Just after we unload the truck with our gear, our comforting little dot goes dark.  I am unsurprised because I’ve long been “map cursed” (likely for doing something bad in a prior life).  We are now smack dab in the center of the middle of nowhere.  We could seek comfort in that we are unlikely to get lost following a creek bed along the canyon floor. But I must admit to having been lost many times when boating along a river.  Don’t even ask how!

Before we hit the trail, I search frantically in the truck for a paper map.  I grab an old decrepit sketch of a trail in New Mexico.  At least we’ll have something on paper, even if it isn’t remotely close to where we are. Jody rolls her eyes. We begin walking.  Thankfully, the “map curse” spares us this time and we reach the ranger station at the end of the hike.  We see a sign that reads, “Lose your connection? Improve your perception.”  Amen!

Diving with Mantas

When planning our visit to Hawaii this spring, Jim and Emmy encourage us to go scuba diving with the manta rays. With trepidation we sign up for the adventure.  It has been 30+ years since we last went scuba diving.  Upon landing in Hawaii, we are both nervous as we don our diving gear.  It gets worse.  Though we both ‘read the brochure’ explaining this would be a night dive, that fact didn’t really hit until…. we are in a boat, pitching about in ominous waves, preparing to dive into an inky black ocean, to swim underwater, relying on unfamiliar equipment, with implausible creatures sporting 25-foot wingspans. 

There is…so…much….to…remember.  Shortly after we begin our descent, having forgot to equalize pressure, I gesture to my ears. We return to the surface to revisit some diving basics.  We sink again, very slowly this time, into the black abyss.  I equalize my ear pressure every inch of the way down, my eyes the size of saucers.

We finally reach the ocean floor where the current gently rocks us back and forth and we must cling onto rocks to hold position.  The ocean is menacing until our diving guide illuminates the bright lights mounted in front of us on the ocean floor.  The first manta ray glides into view.  Then a second.  Then a dozen.  These creatures have come to feed on the plankton attracted by the lights.  They swoop and cartwheel above us, both fantastic and delightful, like dragons performing Cirque de Soleil.  One manta ray’s wing slaps Jody’s head during a pass, after which all our eyes grow to saucer size.  The next day, we stumble around in a stupor of manta ray euphoria while visiting the botanical gardens at Hilo with its stunning tropical plants.   

The map for our journey ends at Volcano National Park.  That night, we hike into a volcanic valley smelling thickly of smoldering sulfur.  We reach a cliff edge and look out to see MOUNT DOOM!  Lava bubbles, boils, and spurts!  Smoke billows about!  Smaug the Dragon flies overhead!  Dorothy, we are definitely not in Colorado anymore. 

Family Thanksgiving, Truth or Dare Style

This Thanksgiving, with family and friends, we visited Zion National Park near Hurricane Utah. Thirteen adults plus four kids.  It was awesome! I was both entranced and threatened when the kids’ metamorphosed into cosmic fighters to defend the universe from invaders. As some of you may recall, these whirlwinds can deliver real damage when launching from a chandelier. 

While the galactic kids tumble & wrestle, we adults start a game of “Farkle.” One might expect a no-stakes dice game like this to remain casual. You’d be wrong.  Our game quickly devolves to “Farkle – Defcon 1”. 

After the neighbors demand we quiet down, we switch to a quieter game of Spoons.  To keep things interesting however, we declare the loser of each round must face “Truth or Dare” consequences.  My brother Dave is soon “dared” to perform a chicken walk… which he performs rather impressively.  I am “truthed” to describe my first jail experience…a story for which my mother holds some accountability.  My mom faced the demanding “truth” question, “Who is your favorite son?”  There is no winning answer, and she knows it. Her eyes dart nervously between me and Dave. Sweat drips from her brow. She then cleverly announces “Mike”, our other brother, who rests safely back in Colorado. Well played, Mom!  

Life in Durango

Jody continues as a Vice President of Strategic Initiatives with Mr. Cooper. She won a prestigious ‘Challenger of Convention’ award which we intend to use for a bicycle tour to Japan next year in April during cherry blossom season.

I remain on the Durango’s Parks & Recreation Advisory Board and involved in several related community efforts.  I’m encouraging the city to reauthorize a local tax to continue investing in the preservation and enhancement of our outdoor parks, open space, and trails.  I’m also advocating for the city to authorize people with disabilities to use pedal assist eMTBs on our trail system as I clearly saw how riding an eMTB helped Jody recover.

Jody and I are proud to have helped Durango Botanical Gardens Durango Botanic Gardens - Home create an entrancing new Literary Garden next to Durango’s community library.  This group literally transformed this previously unnoticed space into an exceptional sanctuary. This summer our hearts sang when we saw families reading books in this magical new oasis.  

Please consider this letter our offering of joy to people we love.  We hope you enjoy our Christmas tidings since it takes some effort!  We pick a few of our best annual pictures for the photo card and develop stories which capture a fraction of each year’s absurdity. 

Here is a smilebox of our Gates of LaDore River Trip.  Enjoy with the sound on!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Jody and Seth Furtney & Thomas the Tom Kat

11 Molas Drive, Durango, CO 81301

Jody Cell Phone: 970-385-5567 / Seth Cell Phone: 970-385-5547 

Email:  jodyfurtney@hotmail.com / sethfurtney@hotmail.com